Breaking The Silence, Wake up

Living with the enemy

“Mans worst fear is being found out”. A quote my step-father recited regularly as if his life depended on it. I guess we are going to see if that is true, is mans worst fear being found out? I guess we will find out now because, Aldrick Kyles(Drico) this post is about you. 2009 my mother introduced us to Drico as they began dating. I was hesitant at first, as stated before I’m good with figuring out who to distance myself from. Eventually he won me over, me and my two brothers. He seemed the perfect “father figure.” My mother was happy and so were all of us. We as a family decided to move back to Arizona. Drico moving along with us, him and his 2 dogs. Aldrick started off as a sweet guy but he was nice until we moved. My siblings and I soon learned he liked control.

After moving back to Arizona my family and I moved into a 2 story home in Avondale. I was in 8th grade at the time. It was the middle of summer and our air conditioning had went out, Drico spent the summer complaining. I being a young lady had started my cycle during this time and disposed of my items in a bag, that went out side. As I was taking my trash outside one-day he stopped me ripped the bag from my hand and opened it up. He then cussed me because he wanted to see what I had. He told my mother that he shouldn’t have seen that and I’ll have to figure out another way. This was only the beginning of his petty moments.

My siblings and I had a ritual of washing dishes on a set schedule. My family cooked, one night and it was my night to do the dishes. I washed all the dishes except 1, it was a pan that I left to soak. Later that night Drico came home in a rage and that night he decided to take it out on me. He came yelling saying that I needed to wash that dish and I explained to him that the food wasn’t coming up and I was leaving it to soak. Any other night we would leave dishes to soak but for some reason this night it wasn’t right. He went upstairs yelling at my mother before leaving out the house his last words were “If I leave its going to be your fault”. All over 1 dish left in the sink to soak, I don’t think so. Looking back I believe that was a test of his power to see how much power he held not over me or my siblings, but my mother. I say that because not to soon after he had left she called me into her room and asked if I wanted him to leave. I just stared at her. She then repeated the same thing he had earlier; ” If he leaves, it will be your fault”.After returning home and calming down he told me I didn’t deserve to sleep in my room. So, I gathered my cover and went to our game room and laid on the couch. He then told me I can’t sleep on his furniture or use his cover. So, I was left to sleep on the floor in an unfurnished bedroom, with no cover or pillows. For a month I did this until he felt I deserved to share my bed with my little brother. That I had earned it. This was only touching surface at what Aldrick would do. We later moved to a different home this year.

In 2010 I was beginning high school. Summer of 2010 Aldrick made a wager with me and my siblings, in order for us to all get new shoes for school we would have to do something he wanted us to do. I hate tea, it makes me sick. In order to get my 2 pair of shoes I would have to drink a glass of tea. My younger brother doesn’t eat any form of condiments on anything. In order to get shoes for school he would have to eat a tuna fish sandwich. And my older brother was made to run around the block in the nude. Humor for Drico really. We got 2 pair of shoes, ones we had no say so over. Driko picked out which shoes we could have. October of 2010 my older brother went to the Army which left me, my younger brother, mother and Aldrick. By march of 2011 my dogs had made puppies, 3 survived; white girl, Cocoa and Phoenix. Puppies were being puppies one day running around the house playing. Aldrick frustrated with this grabbed Phoenix and slung him against the wall breaking his leg. As he whined, we tried to go to help him he told us not to touch him. For hours he wined, the puppies were eventually given away to neighbors and the pound.

At this time Aldrick had begun going down a mentally abusive path. My 10-year-old brother was told on a daily basis that he was stupid. Like cats and dogs they would argue everyday until my mother intervened. In summer of 2011 my grandmother had gotten sick and my younger brother flew down to be with my dad during this time. I was volunteering at a doctor’s office so was unable to go. It was June 2011 when my mother and Aldrick had gotten into an argument. Aldrick grew a rage and began trashing the house breaking everything insight. Blood dripped from his hands as he busted glass and broke TV’s and tables. If you had walked into the home it looked like a murder scene. My mother and I sat watching as he paced back and forth holding his hand like a little child. My mother and I grabbed Gator and we left and went to the park. This was the first of many episodes we would witness from Aldrick.

Summer of 2011 my grandmother passed away and I spent the summer in Tennessee with my father. After my brother and I returned to Arizona it was as if Aldrick had turned a new leaf. He was a new man, but only when my mother was around. I don’t believe he wanted children. He had begun turning off the hot water whenever we went to shower. We were timed only 5 minute showers. He turned the hot water back on when he or my mother were showering though. Whenever my older brother came home he would sneak outside and cut the hot water on for my brother and I. We had to sneak to shower in our own home. It seemed Driko would only get worse.

One night Aldrick and my mother had an altercation and he was outraged again. She asked if he had taken his medicine. This night my younger brother would see the uglier side of him that I saw earlier that summer. This night Aldrick began yelling at the top of his lungs. He stayed up yelling until 3am ; just yelling. He paced back and forth breaking things from room to room. My mother, Brother and I locked ourselves in my brother’s bedroom. He had a bunk bed. I took the top bunk while they shared the bottom. Aldrick came banging on the door threatening to kill us, saying that he would kill us. ” I’m going to kill you with a string”. We stayed up all night long listening as he exclaimed that he didn’t need us and wanted us dead. That night was one of the scariest nights of my life because I know he meant every thing he said. He was serious. This night my brother and I decided we wanted to move away. That was not the last time that year that we were tested by this man.

Aldrick was a kind man, until he wasn’t. Aldrick was mentally abusive and unsafe to live with. I have several stories to tell involving him and I want people to know him for who he truly is. This is only a glimpse of the hell we endured under the roof with him. It may be bombshells to some but everyone isn’t who they seem to be. I tell these small stories to shine light on Domestic Violence. Many families suffer from Domestic violence and abuse daily yet for fear it isn’t spoken on. I had several moments where I should have spoken on the things that were happening in my home but I was scared of consequences. The consequences not for me but for my family. I never told anyone and as a result for years we endeared life under the rule of Aldrick. Abuse whether physical or mental is something that affects everyone. There are many People out there like Aldrick and they need to be stopped! All forms of abuse needs to be stopped.

Break The Silence!!!

( The featured image is the 1 image I have from the first night Aldrick wrecked our home).

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